If someone were to read a biography about me, the title behind my name would make it seem as if I had it all together.
“Sanah Jivani: Creator of the Love Your Natural Self Foundation.”
I run a non-profit organization completely centered around helping individuals love and accept themselves. Self-confidence is the focus of my work, so it makes sense for people to assume that I’m a confident person.
And I am for the most part. Most mornings when I wake up and look in the mirror, I feel great. Most mornings, I am happy to start my day and get out of bed. Most mornings, I wouldn’t change a thing.
That describes most of my mornings. While most of my mornings go wonderfully, some are not so great. Some mornings, when I wake up and look in the mirror, I feel awful in every way. Some mornings, it takes me hours simply to get out of bed. Some mornings, I would change everything about myself.
I used to feel guilty for those mornings. I put a lot of pressure on myself. I felt that as an advocate for self-love, feeling unconfident was not an option.
The body-positive movement has grown so much in the last year, from songs centered around self-love to positive articles to organizations like my own. Everyone is always telling you to love yourself unconditionally. They’re telling you to fall in love with all of the things that make you who you are, even the things you consider flaws. I couldn’t agree more.
What people don’t tell you, however, is that it’s okay to feel badly. It’s okay to have days where you don’t feel like looking in the mirror. It’s a part of self-love. I’ve learned that true self-love consists of ups and downs.
Next time you wake up and don’t feel amazing right away, don’t be so hard on yourself. Realize that you’re only human, and that it’s natural to have bad days. Here’s a quick list of things you can do to help cheer yourself up on the tough days.
1. Positive Affirmations
As silly as it may feel, sometimes you just have to look in the mirror and say the words “I am beautiful” out loud. If that doesn’t work, write yourself a note or place positive sticky notes all around your room. Don’t be afraid to know your worth.
2. Jam Out
Whether it’s “Brave” by Sara Bareilles or “Roar” by Katy Perry, jamming out to your favorite positive song can really help you feel better on a bad day. Grab your hairbrush to use as a microphone and dance like nobody’s watching- You may feel ridiculous, but I promise, you’ll be left with a smile on your face.
3. Talk to Someone Who Loves You
Often, the negative thoughts can be too overwhelming to handle alone. Don’t hesitate to reach out to someone for help. The people who love you are there for you, and sometimes a good venting session is all it takes to clear your mind.
4. Seek Out Positive Media
Some forms of media are often considered the roots of low self-esteem. However, there are so many girl power interviews and inspiring news stories out there. The kind of media you put into your brain can have a major impact on how you’re feeling.
5. Allow Yourself to Feel
Sometimes you will be mad or scared or stressed for no reason, and that’s completely okay. It’s important that you allow yourself to experience these emotions instead of avoiding them. No matter how hard it is at the time, remember that negative emotions are only temporary. By allowing yourself to face your feelings, you’re getting them out of your system.
I used to think (ironically) that self-love was all about perfection. Feeling perfect when waking up in the morning, feeling perfect before going to bed at night and feeling perfect every moment in between. I soon realized that loving yourself is everything but perfect. It’s an imperfect process that takes constant hard work and dedication. One of the best investments you can ever make is investing in yourself. Believe you’re worth it, and work to have a positive image of yourself everyday.
The days you don’t have a positive image of yourself? Realize that it’s okay. At the end of the day, all that matters is that you take the time to care for yourself. As a non-profit owner whose biggest mission is spreading self-love to every individual on the planet, I can honestly say that, no, I don’t love myself everyday. Everyday isn’t perfect, and sometimes I hate what I see in the mirror.
However, I can also honestly say that I know my worth. I invest time and energy in myself, and I believe that I am worth the investment. When I am feeling bad, I do what I can to make myself feel better, but I also allow myself to feel. It’s an imperfect process, but I honestly wouldn’t have it any other way.
Cover image courtesy of Shutterstock.
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